Puzzle Pieces

This is Delani. I write because I try to control my thoughts. I write a lot because I know no one will read it.

Opening Statements: [Pasted/Moved]

Posted 1 month ago

I’ve made three tumblr accounts now because I’m indecisive like that and I also feel like starting fresh at random moments. Currently, I have this need to just type. I just want to type all these words that randomly linger in my brain simply because they’re there, lingering. I guess it’s because I’m lonely again. I’ve come home from my first semester of college and my parents didn’t really plan anything this vacation. Now they’re back at work and I’m left alone again in this quiet, empty house. I just want to talk to someone, but no one’s there.

It’s funny because I don’t realize that need when I’m at the dorms. Sometimes I even feel like I don’t want to talk to anyone there. I guess I just take a lot for granted. But maybe, it also means I am uncertain of what I want when it comes to social interactions. I know I want balance; everyone wants balance. The thing is, I’m pretty sure I’m gradually getting worse and worse socially. Or maybe I’m just still uncomfortable there. It’s still early. Who knows?

I want to be more productive in my life. I always think like this after weeks of just lazing about in my room, not doing anything. Why doesn’t my body ever comply though? I guess I’m just naturally lazy.

Oh! I guess I do have a lot to say. Maybe, I just feel like there’s never a time where people feel like listening. I can chatter on forever. If I could find a way to make that more efficient, maybe then things will be better.

Why am I writing any of this anyway? Do I expect people to read this, like those fictional diaries they sell of factual people that I loved so much in middle school? I should probably read stuff like that again. It’s so sad nowadays though, since it’s so hard to find books anymore. It seems so inconvenient now to go get them. It’s really sad and it’s one of the only things in today’s society that I am ashamed of.

This is too random, but I prefer it that way. Perhaps it bad though since I should learn how to focus my writing and come to a point. Oh well. Some things might never change.